Thursday, 20 August 2015


So a friend of mine showed me one of Russel Brand's videos on YouTube and already I was dreading the terribly confusing British humour I was about to seat through...

But as soon as the video started, my jaw dropped as Russell began to share his views on religion and the world. Each point he made was followed by an intellectual fact mixed with a rare form of honesty that is founded by individualism.

Russell's honesty was based purely on the way he saw the world, yes he acknowledged worldly factors such as the media, pop culture and general stereo types but him acknowledging these factors still did not influence his honest opinions on the world.

His sense of self-acknowledgement and self-truth made me view him as this new age oracle who's mind had supassed all of the capitalist bullshit that has been programmed in our brain. I saw him as this Messiah of the truth when in fact what he has, we all have too. 

As humans we all have the ability to be honest and there is a difference between honesty and bring critical. Do not criticise and be hateful, just be honest In a way that you can only be. Show the world how you analyze things, how your mind works, what brings out which emotions in you.

Think of honesty as a skill that you keep on working on, aiming to reach your maximum ability. When you start having an unwavering honest view of the world, you start being honest with yourself and when you become honest with yourself, you give yourself the rare opportunity of knowing who you really are.

-Tina Tshangela 

It never rains but it pours... When reality hits!!!

And reality hit at the most random of times. After having another fight with my ex boyfriend.

On again, Off again. Further proving that we were not meant for each other. Reality Hit.

Reality hit so hard that it left me feeling numb and lifeless. I felt like a zombie, just a body without a soul.

Reality greedily snatched all of my emotions and left me feeling empty.

I smoked a cigarrette and it calmed me down but as I took the last drag the calm left like the disappearing smoke before me... With a deepening depression I realized that the cigarrette gave me a temporary emotion... A borrowed one.

I realized the world that we live in is built on temporary emotions. The "right now" emotions. The "what feels good is good" emotions. But they are not real.

Revelations started to unveil as I thought of the last time I felt something real. Real emotions. Emotions that don't need enhancers. Emotions that you can feel at 3am in the morning when you wake up suddenly.

Emotions that brought over-whelming emotions, that my silly, greedy and weak humanity could not handle and started running away from.

I'm exhausted from running. God I'm done fighting.

-Tina Tshangela